Test Drive

[travelagency]

Test Drive This is the first test drive for The Last Resort. You can use one of the handy prompts or make up your own. Prompts Prompt #1 There's a new drug being passed through the seedy end of the town which gives many bipedal species the temporary ability to shapeshift into someone else of their species. Needless to say it's very dangerous. Are you working on a cure? Currently trying it out to look hot at the bar? Trying to weed out the dealers? Prompt #2 When a cavespider attacks, usually someone doesn't lose much in the way of memories. They might not even notice what's gone. But your character has been swarmed with them and only remembers half of anything. Try to figure out some things about yourself again by talking to your friends and hope that your memories will be recovered with the reminders. Try not to take advantage of someone and lie to someone with the problem, though. Or do it, you need all the advantages you can get. Prompt #3 A notable and extremely wealthy alien ambassador has just arrived. He loves luxury but is extremely difficult to please. He is also said to be a collector of rare artefacts and some suspect that he may be here to receive stolen goods. Are you staff complaining about his behavior? A scientist keeping a close eye on the museum collections while the ambassador around? A thief planning a heist with a friend in order to sell the goods to the ambassador? Prompt #4 Having a drink at Pugsy's bar, because someone has to try the exotic booze. Be careful, some of it's made with blood. Navigation

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Prompt #3

[most_feared]

[Agent K has the patience of a saint, but this guy's been pushing it. He's sitting at the bar of the diner, trying to eat his pie, but the ambassador has the booth behind him and he can hear every word of his conversation.]

[He looks irritated as hell as he pokes at the pie slice and doesn't envy the people that have to deal with that festering piece of turd. Of course, he's had to deal with the type before, back home, on Earth at his regular job. Which he misses. He always misses it when he's sent away for whatever reason. He misses his partner even more.]

[But listening to that guy? Reminds him of why it's good to get away. Plus this pie ain't half bad. But then he hears him talking about all the women that he has that his wife doesn't know about.]

I feel damn sorry for his maid... [Kay mutters, picking up his comm to scroll through news and see if anything interesting is happening. Tabloids? Also a thing that he strangely misses.]

[hatestriangles]

[It feels like a long time since Perry graduated from the Barge, going home, doing what he could to help the fight against the alien threat. It feels like forever, almost like a dream at times, but then there's the resort, this new alien place he came to when he was out of other options. He might not like the non-humanoid aliens, but at least they're not actively trying to devour and destroy his mind and body. If this is real, the Barge must have been real too.

And of course, he still remembers the people from the Barge. So when he sees the man prodding at his pie at the diner bar, Perry stops short.]

Kay?

[most_feared]

[Sadly there's no recognition on Kay's face when he looks over at Perry. This Kay doesn't know the guy from Adam's left nut, but he's polite about it anyway. he figures this is one of those strange cosmic mix-ups.]

Sorry, you've caught me at a little bit of a disadvantage here.

[He sits up straighter.]

[hatestriangles]

[After all the comas and the disappearances and reappearances on the ship, Perry's not exactly totally unfamiliar with cosmic weirdness. His lips quirk into a smile that's just a little melancholy.]

Perry. Perry Dawsey. This might sound... [He pauses for just a second, considering, but hey, taking Kay's job into account, this probably won't be that out there for the old guy.] I, uh, knew you, somewhere else.

[most_feared]

Hope I made a decent impression. [He's as humble about that sort of thing as ever, not thinking that he has much to do with people anyway. He offers his hand for reintroduction.] That sorta thing happens around here. It's a pleasure to meet you, Dawsey.

[hatestriangles]

Happened there a lot too. [He shakes Kay's hand with a smile.] You- he tried to help me out when I was in a tough situation. Not to make it weird but it's good to see any version of you again.

[most_feared]

Don't worry about it. Honestly I figure if I wasn't a complete shit and I did someone some good, all's well. Have a seat. [Really, seems more like he'll get more talkin' to this guy than listening to the pile of crap behind him.]

Better I be someone decent. I hear that things can go real wrong.

[hatestriangles]

Yeah, well. Sometimes shit hits the fan wherever you go, I guess.

[Perry takes the offered seat with a nod, after a glance over his shoulder at the booth at a particularly loud laugh. The guy's alien, he can tell at a glance. Maybe bipedal and not running around on little tentacles but still. Non-human. He suppresses a tiny shudder and turns back to Kay.]

So how long you been here?

And I let this sit 'cause I was bouncing between things for a couple of days.

[most_feared]

Ah, a couple of months. [He prods distractedly at his pie.] So far nothing too big.

[He snorts and shakes his head.] Really I can't figure out how more than one of me could be floating around here. Usually the way time works as I know it is that if something goes differently, you're boned. Maybe this place dicks it up a little bit. Hell if I know.

[Hey, as long as both versions are getting along okay.] So what's this place you're from like? [He means the ship, but he's the type of guy that would be interested in hearing all about triangle hell, too.]

And I totally psychic-replied and deleted the notif like a big dumb :<

[hatestriangles]

It, uh-- [Perry toys with his communicator, spinning it on the bar with a big hand. His voice is casual but has a sardonic edge.] Well, back on my Earth, everything's been going to hell. Invasion of the body snatchers-type shit. You know how it is.

[He pauses for a second, then looks at Kay with a half-smile.] That's not where I met your doppelganger, though. That was on the space cruise from hell. Weirdest spaceship I've ever had the pleasure to find out about.

Is all good!

[most_feared]

[There's an edge of concern. It may be familiar to Perry; any Earth in trouble is an Earth in trouble. It's like finding out an alternate version of your wife is tied by a villain stereotype and left on the railroad tracks. She might not know you but you don't want her to be there and would panic about it anyway. That's Earth, any Earth for him.]

Yeah, I know how that goes [is all that he says, though. He's still having to wrap his head around this "not my business" thing.]

[This spaceship story catches his attention too, though, and he might as well find out what some ambiguous version of himself got up to.] So what about this cruise was such a bag of dicks?

<3

[hatestriangles]

You want the long or the short version? [Perry hesitates, trying to decide exactly how to start.] First off, it's a prison. Full of a whole bunch of assholes from different universes. Second, it's run by the biggest asshole of them all. There's always some messed up stuff going down, and it's all even more fucked up because people have magic powers and crazy science shit to throw into the mix. And don't get me started on the random personality changes and stops in different worlds.

[He shrugs, somewhat sheepishly.] Sounds crazy, right? I guess it's hard to explain what it's really like if you haven't been there.

[most_feared]

Nah. Not too crazy. But sounds sorta shady as far as prisons go. There's a few prison ships I know about but they're always kind of a risk.

[He assumes he must have been a little desperate to sign onto a place like that, unless somehow they were MiB affiliated.] Anyway, guess you're glad as hell not to be on there anymore.

What plans you got to kick your invasion in the ass?

Re: Prompt #3

[agentj]

[Jay had, thankfully, long outgrown the dramatic, loud-mouth entrances of his past. As such, when he entered no one really gave a second glance. He takes off his glasses and folds them up, giving the place a sweep.]

[He was there for Ambassador Blabbermouth, of course. Rather, whatever illicit activities the egotistical alien may or may totally be involved in. You want someone shaken for info, you send Agent K. If not available, you send the next best thing: the guy trained by Agent K.]


[Except K totally is available. He's like, right there, with his damn pie and his damn articles about I Married Bigfoot like it's no big thing. Jay forgets entirely about Ambassador Whatshisface and stares very unprofessionally totally ruining the Cool Mysterious Guy entrance, because buh?]

You have got to be kidding me.

[So, when a very similarly dressed man carefully took the seat next to Kay, the older man would be met with Jay giving him one expectant smile, hands folded in front of him.]

[most_feared]

Yeah.

[It's not saying much, but to someone familiar in Kay it says, "I'm a little pissed that I'm not at home where people might recognize me because I can't side-eye this bastard hard enough to shut him up." Though, really, when was side-eyeing with the force of silencing someone ever a difficulty for Kay.]

[He edges his pie away from him though, done down to the back crust, and turns a little to look at Jay.]

So I talked to that Klingon about a disruptor. Said he could get me one without having to go through the Blood Pack or anything. Licensed and everything.

[He is excited enough about the prospect of having a new gun that he's actually going directly to that rather than any sort of formal business discussion. As far as Kay and excitement go, that's pretty intense.]

[agentj]

[Jay of course knows Kay's mannerisms; there's no fireworks or crocodile tears for this guy. He's not in anyway insulted, but he sure can pretend to be, because he wouldn't be Jay if he wasn't giving Kay some guff.]

That's it, no hello, no jumping in for selfies? I see how it is, Kay. I'mma remember that.

[He nudges Kay's arm a little with his elbow, giving a grin.]

Yeah? How about hooking me up with one of them Bat'leth?

[most_feared]

[He sits up a little straighter, like it just occurred to him that is a great idea. He should get one, too.]

You know, I think I'm gonna do that.

[He stands up, pushing in the chair to the table with his foot, and digging out his credit card to pay.]

[agentj]

Now that's a scary thought.

[Jay follows in suit standing up, adjusting his suit and smoothing his tie.]

How is that even legal, though? It's the ridges thing, isn't it?

[Jay indicates his own forehead in jest, lifting his brows high so it wrinkles up.]

You just intimidated 'em with yours and they were all like, Oh My God, have my ghu, Kay.

[most_feared]

We're in a place with giant spiders. So long as you're not shipping something through that can blow up one of these small as houses you can carry almost anything.

Heard of the Blood Pack yet?

[He starts walking in that way that he expects Jay to follow. Come on, Jay. Your people need you. And by people he means suited assholes.]

[agentj]

[But those are the hottest best kind of people!]

Is that one of those things where you have to prove yourself in mortal combat but then pretend to die so they-ah, no, wait, I'm thinking of the wrong guys. I'm just gonna assume it's got to do with vampires.

[Jay of course scurries to follow after like a lost duckling, in his Long Legged Slim strides.]

[most_feared]

Not so lucky, Slick. Blood Pack is one of the criminal organizations. [He tucks his hands into his pockets as he walks.] The one around here you can get illegal arms from. Pretty sure these guys are on the up and up but if they turn out to be with the Blood Pack I'd like some back up there.

[He's automatically going to assume Jay is "in" though. Besides, who can turn down the chance for genuine Klingon weapons?]

[agentj]

Oh, right. Wait. They seriously call themselves a "Pack"? Because that is some West Side Story right there. I would pay good money for Klingons to flip out little switchblades and menacingly dance while snapping their fingers. In fact, I think I need to be there just in case that does happen.

[most_feared]

You ain't see the big frogs that run it. [At least that's the best comparison for a Krogan that he can come up with. He pulls his hand out of his pocket to thump Jay on the back of his shoulder, which means he really is in a pretty good mood.]

I don't think you'll have to worry about the bad musical numbers.

[agentj]

[Jay smiles, but it's that pinched in kind like he's trying to hide it because otherwise it'd be his big doofy kid grin. He recovers and adjusts his lapel.]

Well looks like I'll just have to start one of my own. The frogs can join in, too. They weren't so bad in that last Disney movie.

[most_feared]

[He gives Jay a look that seems to ask "what's this about Disney movies?" Since Kay isn't really the type to watch them, still. He's more the type to sit and watch depressing war movies.]

[Then he shakes his head, as if thinking that the likelihood and risk of Jay starting a musical number is real.] I don't think that'll help make the best impression, Tiger.